Monday, September 29, 2008

Why Men Cheat

So I was reading this interesting story on Yahoo! or someplace about "why men are unfaithful." According to the counselor who conducted some kind of study on unfaithful men, the number one reason why men cheat on their wives is, hold your breath, under-appreciation. Apparently men have a tremendous need to win, and if they feel that they are not "winning" in a relationship, they start to withdraw from their spouse.

So gee, on top of all the number of times we have to say "thank you" just because our husband deigns to put his dish in the sink, we have to figure out other ways to show our appreciation so that he doesn't stray!

OK, I can't complain. My husband not only puts his dishes in the sink, but washes them, loads the dishwasher, wipes down the kitchen counters and swiffers the floor. And I do appreciate it. I do. I am very vocal about my appreciation too. Is the compliment returned? Umm, not so often. In fact, getting a compliment from the husband's a lot like extracting teeth -- a painful experience.

Does that mean I am going to get down and dirty with somebody at the nearest motel? I don't think so! Sounds like an excuse to me.

On the other hand, everyone appreciates being appreciated, right? Cee Kay was ranting in a recent post about a similar thing. The double standard where the husband is praised to the skies by parents, in-laws, etc. for doing work around the house. But the lady of the house can't do enough for her family to be similarly praised. Even the husband, the person who one would think would be supremely aware of what his wife does to keep the family functioning in a well-oiled fashion -- even he seems to take all that work for granted.

It would be so nice to be appreciated by our spouses. Just once in a while. Just a few words is all it takes to make my day. To make all the cooking, cleaning, feeding feel less like chores and more like one's making a difference. Even when people KNOW that they're doing mundane stuff that needs to be done. Just because everyone has to do it, should it be any less of a big deal?

The counselor in the news story had some useful stuff to say too: about how it's important for a husband and wife to shut off the TV and the "Crackberrys" and communicate for about 45 minutes at least 4 times a week. I know if I don't "download" my day to P, I feel dissatisfied. Like I haven't completely de-stressed. And TV, email, blogging (!), cell phones all cut into the time I have with him.

So shut down the electricity and light some candles, people! Maybe we can then have a heart-to-heart about our MUTUAL need for appreciation.

Saturday, September 13, 2008

Got Game?

Pikey The Cat aka Non-Official Lucky Mascot of the Ohio State Football Team is gearing up for the big game tonight against USC...

As you can see here, she's attempting to escape the firm clasp of a determined little player to score the winning touchdown. Trounce the Trojans, Pikey, ummm, Buckeyes! Beanie or no Beanie, Sloopy will hang on...

Tuesday, September 09, 2008

Palin In Comparison

American women wanted Hillary Clinton in the White House -- but since they can't have her, they'll settle for the next best thing, Sarah Palin.
If the political pundits are to be believed, that's why Republican presidential hopeful John McCain chose the completely unknown glam queen (she was a runner up for Miss Alaska) as running mate -- hoping to cop the votes of those women feeling disenfranchised after Clinton failed to win the Democratic presidential nomination.
My first thought when I read that was "What the heck was he thinking?" I mean, it's laughable, right?
On the one hand you have (or don't have, as the case turned out) Hillary, strongly intelligent, pro-choice, as experienced in world politics as, well, Bill, with a hefty 8 years under her belt as U.S. senator and ummm, a Democrat.
On the other, you have Sarah, no doubt intelligent (but how do we know that?), anti-abortion, a gun owner (has anyone seen that picture of her proudly posing with that moose she killed?), experienced in world politics because "Alaska is the closest to Russia," courtesy Cindy McCain (who could be First Dumb Blonde Lady -- let's not even go there), experienced to help lead a nation of 250 million because her longest political stint has been as mayor of a town of 7,000 people (though she's been governor now for less than 2 years) and ummm, a Republican.
Sound like twins, don't they?
McCain obviously thinks so. He thinks women either don't care or don't have the requisite intelligence to understand that all Clinton and Palin share is gender. That just because Palin is a woman, Hillary supporters will rally around her, catapulting McCain to the White House. And once there, Palin will just... fade away into the background, letting the man lead. Like she herself said, what does a vice president do anyway?
If Palin ever became vice president, it would be one small step for woman, one giant leap backward for womankind.
So what's the American woman to do? Vote for Obama, I say.
Wish I could.

Tuesday, September 02, 2008

Thankee, thankee!

Got this bling from Mamma Mia! Me A Mamma? ( Thanks, Mamma Mia! I am not worthy, etc., but I am truly gratified! You know, I started this blog just for me. Although I'd been a reporter, I was so burnt out I couldn't write about stuff that mattered to me anymore. This blog was an attempt to regain my ability to put my thoughts down. But the true inspiration was Raina.

After her birth, there was just so much about her that I wanted to record. And that spurred me to sit before the computer and blog about Raising Raina. But once I started, it seemed that there was so much I wanted to say, after all. And this blog became more than notes for posterity. It became a journal.

When other folks began to read it and comment on it, I was amazed. This was so much more fun than merely a journal! My blog's now a kind of sharing of thoughts and life incidents with actual, real, live people! And I get to share in their lives too! Sounds an awful lot like friendship to me -- even though I've read that what people blog is not really who they are, that we just see the face they want to portray. Well, who's to say that what they portray is not who they really are? And how do we know who people really are, even when we do meet them face-to-face?

What I'm saying is, this works for me.

OK, now on to passing this wonderful award to some truly deserving folks. Because that's what the rules say. Got to pass it on to 7 more. Most of these folks have already received this award multiple times, but what the heck. Surely they don't get tired of hearing how brilliant their writing is? They are all on my blogroll.

1. Eve's Lungs. For her astute observations.

2. Dipali's Of This and That. For her thoughtful words which transform the everyday to the extraordinary.

3. Terri's Tails. For showing us the world through an ABCDog's humorous eyes.

4. Anamika's Thinking Cramps. For painting pictures through her words.

5, 6, 7, 8, 9. For Cee Kay and Choxbox, Mad Momma, Mystic and CrazyMumma for sharing their own wonderful experience of mommyhood -- including the zillion gaffes we make -- with honesty and humor.

All you ladies are so inspiring! Go forth and pass on the award to blogs that inspire you. The rules are below:

This award is for blogs whose content and/or design are brilliant as well as creative.
The purpose of the prize is to promote as many blogs as possible in the blogosphere.
1. When you receive the prize you must write a post showing it, together with the name of who has given it to you, and link them back
2. Choose a minimum of 7 blogs (or even more) that you find brilliant in their content or design.
3. Show their names and links and leave them a comment informing they were prized with ‘Brilliant Weblog’
4. Show a picture of those who awarded you and those you give the prize (optional).
5. And then we pass it on!